I am ADDICTED TO PINTEREST. dun dun dunnnnnn GASP.
stop judging me!
I used to hate it...then I browsed for special craft projects... then I made some boards... and before I knew it.... I am on every night before bed slowly designing my dream house!
(f.y.i. it is a vintage inspired cottage in Hawaii with eclectic design elements)
well anyways, feel free to follow me here! I'm clearly down the rabbit hole.
sometimes I have no idea what I'm doing...allow me to clarify.... most of the time I have no idea what I'm doing.
ALSO I never know how to ask, "excuse me, what should I be doing?"
BUT today I stumbled over my words and got out the question.
AND I was actually told what I should do.
you guys this is what I think people refer to as a breakthrough.
Mom and I always discuss the principle of "take things one day at a time, and if that is too much one hour at a time"-she knows me well.
You see, I'm an addict.
I dive head first. I thrive under pressure because, as I mentioned, I never know what I'm doing!
I just figure it out.
I work harder than 90% of the population to fix everything as quickly as I can, the best that I can.
So when this "control" is taken from me...when I need to speak up or be confrontational in any way because I can't just figure it out immediately...
I meltdown y'all.
When there is no other option but to surrender....ughhhh it is the worst.
This week has humbled me, but it led to something good.
I decided to go one day at a time.
I realized that sometimes things aren't an easy fix-but there are people who actually know what to do.
People who can... I don't know help!
I sincerely hope you, me, and everyone we know has a wonderful Monday!
Kate Arends, a designer/blogger over at wit and delight, has been a personal hero of mine for a while. She is brave, eloquent, and true in every post she writes, and her design aesthetic is gorgeous. She recently recorded a podcast for The Lively show..YOU GUYS...it is chock full of good stuff if you need a boost to start the week! She touches on mental health, perfectionism, authenticity, and even design-It is a beautiful conversation beginning to end.
I loved her definition on what it means to be authentic:
"authenticity is really when you don't need the affirmation of anyone else to feel very good about what you have to say or what your point of view is"
oh hey Friday! My week has been a bit hectic over here so I'm very excited to talk faves today y'all-let's dive right in!
for starters...I've been reading a lot this week. The weather has been positively dreamy, so we at apartment two have been keeping all of the windows open-I just sit lazily reading and let the breeze blow through the apartment...heaven. Two of my favorites thus far have been "This Is Where I Leave You" (hysterical) and "Wild". Hopefully, the movies do them justice!
Another favorite right now is my new acting class ! Acting classes are intimidating, so I am very relieved this first week in a new one has been very positive.
My most ambitious favorite yet is.... my new fall bucket list!
I highly encourage everyone to make one with me! just think of 10 things you hope to accomplish between now and the end of November-I decided on 5 fun things and 5 challenges.
Number 1 challenge for me is cooking! I am not good at this you guys! I hope to start cooking some healthy meals 4 or 5 nights a week if possible! it is supposed to be a challenge after all, am I right? so if you know of a good recipe I should try-send it my way! My number 1 fun task is to see a play. I never go to the theater here, which is absolutely bananas!! I am solving this problem.
okay so big stuff ahead
Did I mention this will be my last week at apartment 2? Basically I'm saying... you can come help me move if you want! New York is great for so many things... moving isn't one of them. I miss my car ahhhhhh I miss having tons of family and friends around to help me pack ahhhhh it's okay.
REALLY.
I CAN DO IT.
I CAN.
okay hope your weekend is super fun! cheers pals xo
New York is feeling an awful lot like fall dear reader. Today, I even needed a light jacket! This weather makes me want to sip on coffee, wear tights, and listen to lots of Dylan. I think "To Ramona" is one of the nicest letters/songs ever written in the history of the world. Every year around this time I find myself putting it on repeat. you should do the same
Tonight, I stayed in and crafted-yes, I know I am officially becoming that weird cat lady. I told myself I would never buy yarn, but then it was cold out and I broke down.
whatever. I am pretty happy with the end product! let's hope it keeps away my bad dreams for years to come :)
"I can see that your head
Has been twisted and fed
With worthless foam from the mouth
I can tell you are torn
Between stayin' and returnin'
Back to the South
You've been fooled into thinking
That the finishin' end is at hand
Yet there's no one to beat you
No one to defeat you
'Cept the thoughts of yourself feeling bad"
I tried yoga.
I can't believe it either.
Know what is even worse than me trying it? I kind of loved it. I know, I know! I'm just as shocked as you are! Okay so here is how this went down...
Part 1: I decided that my only goal this year would be to break out of my comfort zone and conquer fears that hold me back. (blah blah Oprah blah).
Part 2: I went home last week, and long story short realized that my health is important. I realized I'm not actually sixteen anymore. My body is something to be thankful for and conscious of-It was sort of a wake up call to take better care of myself. NOW, I am not saying that I will now be a track runner or a vegan! this is ME after all...but I can be better. My goal isn't to be the size I was in high-school or to stop eating bread, but to be strong. I want to feel strong.
(Here I am eating the best sandwich and hot dog of my life in Paris!)
Part 3: This blog ain't called calm like a bomb for nothing! That is me you guys! I am calm...like a bomb. It turns out your mental health is just as important as your physical health! You see, my entire life I had play rehearsal. I had a wonderful outlet for stress all of the time! Until... I didn't. I began to venture away from theater and into this new world of film, and truly didn't know how to live without those rehearsals ruling my life. That combined with graduating from college without a steady plan made my anxiety soar.
and all of these things led me to yoga class tonight
I'm so intimidated by exercise classes because I never take them. Yoga seemed challenging enough, but mainly focused on meditation and breathing. It's quiet and peaceful and slow moving. At one point I felt ridiculous in class...like I was playing twister, but when I left I had no tension in my back and no thoughts racing through my mind.
pretty much a miracle. so I signed up for a few more- we will see if this sticks- but it's a step right?
